By A. R. Hildebrand
The man stood on my front step, white suit hanging over his unnaturally tall, thin frame, my morning paper in his hand. I pulled my bathrobe tighter and blearily glanced from his rainbow wig to my paper as I processed his greeting.
“So… you said you’re the grim reaper?”
A normal person wouldn’t have invited him in for breakfast; a normal person wouldn’t have been as hungover as I was. He sat at the table looking over the crossword puzzle, while I tried to think of something to break the silence.
“You want a couple slices of bacon? I’m making myself some so I wondered if you… eat?”
“Of course, everyone requires sustenance from time to time.” His eyes gave me a concerned once over. “May I just say you look worn out?”
“Yeah…” I stared at the pack of hotdogs I had pulled from the fridge. “I had a long night.”
“Well sit down before you fall down.” He stood up from the table. “Let me make you breakfast.”
Groggily, I sank into a chair and watched him pull bacon and eggs from the fridge. He began to hum and work over the stove.
“By the way—” I winced against the headache. “Why exactly are you here?”
He stopped and stared out the window. His shoulders sagged and he turned to look me in the eyes, his gaze doing a good job of sobering me up.
“Indemnity?” the reaper asked.
“What?”
“Eighteen across on the crossword.”
I glanced down at the paper. “It’s only seven letters.”
“Wait—” A look of surprise crossed his face. “You’re supposed to only put one in each square?”
“How have you been doing them?”
“I usually just write overtop of the other words; I never got why people found crosswords so challenging.”
Winston wandered in, rubbed my leg, coughed up a hairball, and wandered back out.
“Cute.” The reaper scooped eggs onto a pair of plates.
“Yeah, he hasn’t been feeling well lately.”
“I meant the picture.” He indicated a photo above the sink of me and some friends in antlers. “Christmas party?”
“Yeah.”
He set the plates on the table. “Hope it wasn’t your last.”
Once we finished eating and properly filling out the crossword puzzle, he pushed his chair back, rested his hands on his knees, and faced me.
“It’s time to talk about why I’m here.”
“Must we?”
“I’m afraid so.”
I twisted my fingers in my lap and wished I was drunk again instead of hungover.
Leaning forward, the reaper laid a supporting hand on my shoulder. “We are each gifted a limited amount of time on this planet, and it’s not our place to question why one individual gets more or one gets less. No one knows when or where his time will come.” He brushed rainbow curls back from his eyes. “It is my job to try and make the passing easier, to help when it is time to move on.”
Mom always said I would die hungover. Would the death throes be better or worse with a splitting headache? But he had said his job was to make the passing easier. Or maybe, since I was already talking to the reaper—
“Tell me…” I stared at my clasped hands, trying to avoid his watery gaze. “Am I already dead?”
He gave me a blank look. “What? You’re fine, I just came for the cat.”
I took what I still hold to be the longest blink of my life, laughed, hugged the reaper, and broke down crying.
Once the reaper escaped my grasp, he gave me some time to collect myself and say goodbye to my cat. I tried explaining the situation to Winston, but he really just seemed interested in the underside of the couch. I gave him a final pet and gently placed him in the reaper’s arms.
“Wish we could have had more time together. Maybe I’ll see you sometime in your next life.”
Winston purred and curled deeper into the reaper’s arms.
As I watched them leave together, I knew that, while my time wasn’t now, someday that tall thin man would return to my door for breakfast. When I next saw his rainbow wig I wanted to be ready. Standing on the front step again, inhaling the fresh morning air, I was struck with a thought. Maybe Winston was the one moving to a literal new life, but today I got a new start to this one.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Amazing and thought provoking.
I mean, as tragic as cat death is, the wacky theme fit so well! Your reaper had me laughing aloud.
Hahaha, that line “What? You’re fine, I just came for the cat” was delivered so well. Very entertaining reinterpretation of the reaper.
And this is why Wacky Wednesday might just be my favorite day of the week.
A reaper in a rainbow colored wig!
It’s like choosing a favorite child. Buuuut…yeah. Wednesday is my fave.
“I usually just write overtop of the other words; I never got why people found crosswords so challenging.” LOL!!!!!!
So quirky and thought provoking at the same time!
What a unique story! Not only was it funny (I LOVE the image of a grim reaper with rainbow hair :D), but it had such a bright, purposeful ending.
Thank you so much for the comments! I’m glad to see you all enjoyed it. The opening floated into my brain one weekend and the story was born.
This story makes me so happy! First time I read it I choke-laughed on “You’re fine. I just came for the cat.”
Oh my gosh!!! I laughed so hard, cried, and then read it out loud to my husband. Love it!!!!!!!
I like cats and I still like this story. Good job.
Kept me involved. I loved the mix of fun and serious. Nice Job.
I always enjoy stories where Death shows up. There are so many different interpretations and ideas surrounding the topic that it offers endless fodder for stories. This was a fun one.
I laughed out loud! So clever and quirky.
This is still my favorite story Havok has put out so far.
He kept the cat:
https://gohavok.com/2019/11/01/resurrection-in-a-bottle/