Havok Publishing

Humor

The Big Ad Wolf

Safe inside the brick house, the three little pigs exchanged high-twos as the sweaty, exhausted wolf slunk away in defeat.
Big brother Wally chuckled. “I knew all that huffing and puffing was just a bluff.”
Younger sister Trish hugged Wally. “You saved our pigskins.”
Youngest sister Carrie joined in the hug. “Wally, we were

Read it now

Grave Robbers

There are dozens of problems you may encounter when stealing your own coffin, but for Vlad, it was his lack of physical hands. Having been a ghost for only four hundred years, he’d gotten very good at blowing out candles in the castle but hadn’t yet mastered complex haunting techniques.
Like levitating coffins

Read it now

The Queen of Hidrasie

The whole town had one table.
Baie’s great-uncle Dwall had brought it home with him back in 1960-something after a long absence across the African continent. He’d promised to return with the town’s first car.
Many in the tiny Burundi hamlet scoffed. Dwall would not succeed. Even if he did, what good was a

Read it now

Rise of the Serpopard

I arrive in the Valley of the Kings in an air conditioned car. When I open the door, I’m blasted with Egypt’s oppressive heat. Howard’s tent is his only protection from the sweltering sun, but he steps out to welcome me to the set.
He’s a famous, multi-award-winning director, so I’m willing to…

Read it now

An Untimely Inconvenience

Merit flicked his tail in frustration. His best servant—Pharaoh something or other—was dead. He knew this because when he’d arrived for his morning scratch, the human had just lain there, eyes open but unseeing. The body had also been cold. Not good for curling up next to.
Still, to be sure…

Read it now

Maaaah!

Great colleagues are worth fighting for.
My partner and I have been looking for a case to solve for weeks, and I’ve finally stumbled upon something. “Constable Yo-yo, have you seen the mummified crocodile for sale?”
“Maaah,” bleats the constable.
When initially partnered with a rove goat two months ago I asked,

Read it now

The Thing about Adventures

The thing about adventures is they’re only fun in hindsight.
Take last week, for example. My car broke down, which wouldn’t be too special, except it was in a ginormous mudhole. While it was raining. Actually, raining is too mild a description. This was a monsoon.
I stared out the windscreen…

Read it now

Something’s Burning

Huey pulled at his shirt collar as sweat ran into his golden-brown eyes. He didn’t know how much of this stifling darkness he could take.
Zip.
Huey, god of mischief, inhaled fresh air as Tema opened her suitcase. “Hiya, best friend,” he greeted her. Tema shrieked.
“Huey!” She slapped his arm repeatedly.

Read it now

Zombie Road Trip

“We hit this gas station”—I point at a crease in the map spread out over the RV’s dining table—“grab food, toilet paper, gas—”
“And slushies,” Martin chimes in.
“—and slushies. Then we hightail it to the monument, here.”
I survey my crew. Martin, my younger brother, looks like a…

Read it now

The Mothman Miracle

The inspector tapped on the microphone. A sharp burst of static filled the room. “All right. We have Prisoner WVM-01 here for questioning. Please detail for our records your involvement in the Silver Bridge Accident on December 15th, 1967.” He flicked on a floodlight, and I blinked behind my night vision goggles.

Read it now

Caught in a Prickle

Martin awoke to a few unexpected discoveries, the first of which was finding himself suspended upside down from a tree branch. Considering his last memory was losing his footing and tumbling down a sharp embankment, this predicament came as a relief. After all, he wasn’t dead or grievously injured. So that was a plus.

Read it now

The End of the World?

Still in coyote form, Huey’s paws landed on the grass of Tema’s garden. He turned back into a man and collapsed to the ground, panting heavily. The giant’s cries of “Stop, thief!” had echoed all the way up the Stairway to Heaven, but Huey was safe now.
Safe with his treasure.
“Ow! Huey moaned.

Read it now