Two-Eyed Vermin

By Katrina Michelle

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This is Day 1 of the Heymon Project. The traps are set. My colleagues laugh at me for entertaining the notion that any heymons have managed to sneak into our woods, but we’ll see. According to my research, they are curious and adventurous creatures. I have little doubt they’re somewhere out there. The question is, are they smart enough to see my traps for what they really are?

[Pause. Sigh.] I’ll update soon. I timed this recording poorly—the alarm is about to go off for our fire drill. [Squealing wail is abruptly cut off.]

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Welcome to Day 4 of the Heymon Project! The traps have been left untouched the past couple days, but today I noticed one of them had been tampered with. Several of my colleagues think it was a small animal, like a rorbyte, but judging by the carefully untied rope, it had to have been a more intelligent creature.

I think…[sniff] I’m going to modify one of the traps. [Thud as recording device is set down.] Heymons may be intelligent for their size, but I would not be this far into the research program if I couldn’t wrangle difficult problems.

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It’s Day 8 of the Heymon Project. Professor Cyanus informed me that my previous two recordings are too reflective and not technical enough. What are my traps, and what exactly are the modifications I’m making to my attempt to catch a heymon? Stopping to iron out the details, however, will disrupt my flow. I plan to fully engage my mind as I execute the project, and I’ll add the technical aspects later.

[Muffled beep. Long pause.] Whoa… The sensor I set up is telling me one of my traps has sprung. Let me just take off my goggle and—[Clatter of goggle falling to floor.] Oops. Wow, I’m a little excited. I’d take you with me, but there’s too much else to carry. [Deep breath.] Let’s pray I’ve finally caught my heymon.

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Day 9 of the Heymon Project.

[Incredulous laugh.] Let me just describe this scene to you. I’m sitting at my gadget table. Everything’s been cleared off except the cage I prepared for the heymon. He’s more miniscule than I expected, no larger than my clenched fist. He’s also no longer squeaking at me like when I carried him through the woods back to the institute. There was enough noise coming from my colleagues’ laboratories that they didn’t hear him, and I’m not going to show them until I’m well into the examination because they’ll swarm my lab. Still, I can’t deny I want to shout from the rooftop about this! Catching a heymon is a remarkable achievement. The accolades I could get…

But I digress. First, I’m hoping to discover how the heymon body works. He’s male—I determined this after pulling off the covering heymons purportedly use to help them blend into their surroundings. He’s shaking now, and curled up, so maybe the covering is also for warmth.

[Snap of latex glove.] I also imagine he’s afraid of me. Heymons bear a remarkable resemblance to us cyclops in many ways, but naturally our drastic size difference would make me appear intimidating. I’ll be extra gentle, then, as I remove him from the cage… [Creak of cage door.]

Hey, little guy, I just want to look at—Ow! [Hiss of pain.] Heymon teeth are powerful despite lack of sharpness. Gosh, I’m bleeding. Two-eyed vermin doesn’t understand I don’t want to hurt him.

Okay. Okay. This is fine. I’m going to clean this surprisingly deep cut, then brainstorm a new approach. To examine his eyes, I need him to lie still under my magnifying device. May have to sedate him. I’ll update soon.

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Day 12 of the Heymon Project. It’s taken me three days to dilute a sedative enough to where I’m confident it won’t harm him. He’s looking at me while I prepare the drink, and I won’t deny his gaze unsettles me. [Nervous laugh.] The eyes are intelligent, if tiny. I’ve begun to feel like I’m experimenting on a miniature, two-eyed version of myself. He even has short, brown hair like me.

The sedative is planted. I haven’t given him water for almost twenty-four hours, so he should be eager to drink. [Pause. Sigh.] Or maybe he’ll continue to be stubborn. I’ll just… tune the magnifying device. [Squeak of swivel chair.]

Hiding the heymon from Professor Cyanus and my colleagues has been a challenge, especially since it forces me to pretend my whole project is flopping. But it’s worth it to have privacy to reconsider my project’s aims. I’m almost wondering if the similarities between our species extend beyond general body structure—besides eye and size differences, of course. Could he possibly have a sense of morality?

I’ll start another recording after the sedative takes effect.

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As you can see, it’s been almost two weeks since my last update. The Heymon Project is, indeed, a flop. My specimen escaped after I left him under the magnifying device. He tricked me into thinking he had actually drunk the sedative. I searched every inch of my laboratory, but he’s gone, the room’s nooks and crannies working in his favor.

I won’t lie, I’m almost glad he got away. There was something distinctly cyclopian about his mannerisms. It didn’t feel right to treat him like lab vermin.

[Sigh.] Accolades would have been a dream come true, but I have learned one thing: the intelligence of the heymon race is higher than any of us thought. [Knock on door.] That must be Professor Cyanus. Hopefully when she listens to these recordings, she’ll realize at least part of the Heymon Project was a success.

Maybe one of my colleagues can assist me with the Heymon Project 2.0. After all, two eyes appear to work better than one.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Katrina Michelle is a university student doing her best to balance classes with her passion for storytelling. She spends her days studying in pursuit of a Spanish degree, inching through her most recent short story or novel WIP, and devouring books (such a sweet break from academic reading). Her Myers-Briggs type is INFP, and she can’t look at any BBC Merlin pins on Pinterest without feeling suddenly and extremely emotional.

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