audio293874931.cyfile [saved on 9/3, 1:05]
This is Day 1 of the Heymon Project. The traps are set. My colleagues laugh at me for entertaining the notion that any heymons have managed to sneak into our woods, but we’ll see. According to my research, they are curious and adventurous creatures. I have little doubt they’re
The ship’s hatch opened with a hydraulic hiss. My team stood behind me as the door lowered to create a ramp. I walked about halfway down and stopped. The grassy meadow we’d chosen for landing spread around us. A dense forest circled the meadow in every direction.
“I’ve got the xallenite,” Myra said
The scorching heat retreated as the wall of flame fizzled into nothingness. Irrick looked across the ruined campfire at the soot-stained face blinking back at him.
Wonderful! he thought. Those eyebrows aren’t going to grow back in a hurry.
“Gah! Why wizard’s fire magic so strong?” bellowed Krull “Now Krull’s supper ruined!”
“No, no.” The High Wizard flicked his hand as if a royal command was a mere annoyance. “I must stay here. If you fail, I’ll need to protect the castle.”
Brandt scowled. He might be the youngest son, but that made him no less a prince. He expected compliance. But High Wizard Eldred acted as
Eighty bucks seemed like a lot, but it was for Gerald’s thirtieth birthday, so I clicked “confirm” before I could regret those eighty dollars—which turned out to be $97.89 after shipping and tax. I was already on the receipt page when I started to worry how legitimate it was.
Thankfully,
It takes a special kind of stupid to ride a dragon drunk.
Or maybe I rode a drunk dragon. The details are fuzzy. Many things are fuzzy right now, starting with where I am and how far I fell before I landed.
I open my eyes. Currently, they’re the only parts of my body that don’t hurt.
Of all the things to deal with right before a room check, of course I have to put out dragon fire.
“Venus, what did you do?” I gape at the flames eating my dorm room’s floor, then glare at the perpetrator.
Venus, the tiny dragon living under my bed, preens her golden
“I’m Luke Skywalker, and I’m here to rescue you!”
I stride through the doors of my time machine, my compact, titanium blaster swinging jauntily from my hand.
Beneath her white lace cap, the young woman’s eyes widen. She scrambles to her feet. The iron chains clamped to her wrists rattle loudly.
To: georgethegremlinhaha@crashandburn.com
From: sirfrederickgrim@upgradeorbust.org
Subject: Re: Hello…
Dear Cousin George,
It’s good to finally hear from you! Are you still living in that cheap hunk of metal you call a computer? The one you’re always complaining about at gremlin get-togethers?
“Forking Larkspur?” The Chairman asked for the third time, pacing in front of Corduroy and me.
“Yes.” I could hear my prince grinding his teeth. The Chairman’s anxiety was getting on our nerves. “Someone sent Trudy oodles of those flowers, and it interfered with her poison-sensing abilities.”
My best friend and fairy godmother
It had been three months since someone last licked me.
That was a weird experience.
The offending party apologized profusely and dropped me like I was a talking cupcake. Which, at the time, I was. Couldn’t really blame them for running away screaming.
Now, trying not to be nervous, I locked up my realtor’s
“Kid. Hey, kid.”
Stuart felt a hand slap his cheek.
“You okay?”
Stuart groaned and opened his eyes. Something bright and orange hovered above him. “Yeah, I think so.”
He pulled himself up as his vision focused. The orange solidified into an upright tapir with a tortoise shell, the dorsal appendage of an anglerfish
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