Havok Publishing

Humor

New Jersey and You

“Officer, what you mean I can’t pump my own gas?” The shorter man scowled up from his car, biting off his words. The neon sign of the station flickered on and off while the smell of exhaust filled Officer Ortega’s nostrils.
Ortega sighed. “I’m sorry sir, that’s the law in New Jersey,”

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Destination: Nowhere

Carter walks through the terminal doors and blinks. One minute ago, he was stumbling around in the dark, lost in a briar patch along the Appalachian Trail. Now he’s standing in what looks like an airport from the 1970s. A group of stewardesses in robin’s-egg blue uniforms giggle and wave as they pass.

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The Necromancer’s Diamond

“Perhaps the necromancer’s asleep?” asked One-Legged Val.
From a distance, the necromancer’s ship looked abandoned, dark except for the giant glowing diamond shining from the masthead like a full moon. The crew of Nevermore floated in deep water off the coast of Dogshead Isle, their lanterns doused and sails tied down, transfixed

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Going to Extremes

“Derek Percy handed me a challenge.” Hazel Williamson gripped the edge of her desk as she leaned toward her screen. “It’s the toughest our company’s ever faced.”
Nui grinned at his CEO. “Hazel, Earth Extreme Travel lives on challenge.” He jerked his thumb toward the advertising hologram by his X-Games trophies. “Says so, right there.”

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The Irukandji Jellyfish

Jenna breathed in the fresh, salty air, preparing herself for the poisonous quest ahead. Would today be the day she told him?
Professor Herbert sat on the sand with his sturdy legs crossed, scanning their surroundings.
The Australian coast spread out like a strip of grainy brown paint. It banked against the trees…

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Yara-Ma-Yha-Who

There’s nothing like finding yourself in the middle of nowhere, in a strange country, sitting like bait in a trap under a giant fig tree, to make you stop and think about your life-choices.
I always considered myself to be a reasonably intelligent, cautious person, but would a reasonably intelligent, cautious person be…

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Killing SPPREE

“Doctors, we have a murderer among us.” Standing at the lectern boulder at the center of base camp, Dr. Angela Mansfield glared in turn at each of her three surviving colleagues. Each were seated on logs around the council circle, every shocked face bathed in an amber glow from the setting sun behind her.

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Tyger, Tyger, Burning Bright

“What’s the main difference between Bigfoot, the Yeti, and the Tasmanian Tiger?” challenged Boof Turnbull, the bulldog-faced mayor of Dunnayewie.
The small gathering shuffled their feet and made asides to each other, fearing a trick question.
Finally, Shady Oaks ventured, “There’s no Bigfoot or Yeti here in Tassie?”
“Jesus, clowns to the left

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Regretfully Yours, Miss O’Reilly

I knew I would regret taking Cuthbert Devereaux’s navigation advice.
When my old nemesis butted into my mission in Nazi Germany, he brought nothing but trouble. It’s entirely his fault we landed in colonial Australia. Now we’re trussed like roasted chickens and propped against a pile of dusty saddlebags in an outlaw camp.

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The Lightning Squad

Puddles along the street mirrored the blue neon glow of the Chiang Mai business district. Tiny zips of lights flashed across the roadway, adding their spark to the reflective glow. Flickering lights continued to fill the street, until finally the mighty lightning bug army descended, rippling the puddles, at the rendezvous point chosen months

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The Elephant in the Elevator

“Time for your first elephant hunt, Ms. Chowdhury.” Inspector Patel’s gaze was fixed on the huge, disc-shaped space elevator descending the cable toward its Himalayan base. So was mine, but with more awe—this system lets us easily and regularly reach space itself!
My pulse accelerated. I tapped my case. “My equipment is ready…

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