Havok Publishing

Humor

Taco Tuesday Temptation

Tacos.
I woke from a delicious dream of seasoned meats and melted cheese. Hazily, I grappled for my phone and tried to focus my still-bleary eyes. Of course I was dreaming of tacos. It’s Taco Tuesday.
Or it should be Taco Tuesday, but for me there would be no carnitas wrapped in soft,

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The Ring

The ring winked in the pale evening light, mocking me for my foolishness. Sure, I didn’t know the difference between a faceted sapphire and a chipped piece of glass, but I’d reasoned such a pretty trinket was worth at least a loaf of bread.
Unfortunately, the baker disagreed. His face was an ugly shade

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Hard Baked Detective and the Sot Sibling

Most people are skeptical when they hear a sentient cake has a PI’s license, but get your picture in the paper enough, and you begin to gain credibility with a capital C. That, and the delicious smell of my chocolate ganache, is how Agatha Vanderbruin Von Marnestein found her way to my office.

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The Cake Thief

“This is all your fault,” a robotic voice growled.
Mark glanced in the rearview mirror at the cream-colored Himalayan. Though Zeus looked pitiful splayed across the backseat, eyes droopy and tummy bulging, Mark felt little sympathy. “How is this my fault?”
“You left that cake on the counter,” Zeus whined. His translation collar blinked

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Demon Eggs

Saturday night in the World Capital Hospital’s Emergency Department is often full of surprises. Maybe the biggest came when Earth’s President, Derek Percy, was wheeled in strapped to a gurney after trying to claw his own face off. As the chief resident of the Emergency Department, it fell to me to investigate.

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The Scaterpillars

Matt Caterpillar raised his guitar, looked out across the crowd at the Garbage Bowl, and heard crickets. And ants. And roaches, beetles, and myriad other insects—all cheering for him and his band.
As he strummed the opening chords of their new ear-worm hit, “Gimme Some Leaves,” he marveled at their

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Plop Plop, Fizz Fizz

It smelled like apricot. Actually, more like an apricot that had been left on the counter for a month, and then shoved in the corner of the fruit drawer, where ethylene gas had rotted a month’s worth of produce.
Dr. Daniel Leslie stood in the science building at Blaylock University after receiving…

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A Feast of Rats

The rats are disappearing.
Hart Street had the biggest infestation in London. We knew that before we moved in—it’s why the house came at such a low price. But we needed somewhere to lay low, so I assured the Professor we could deal with it. I’ve dealt with worse.
Still, my skin still crawled

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How the Red Panda Got His Fluffy Earlobe

You’ve heard of MadLibs, right? Well, we’ve developed our own version of that zesty party game, thanks to the generous tech wizardry of Havok author Nathan Veyon. Today we feature the a story written entirely via the vivacious blind contributions of Animal Kingdom launch party attendees. While such absurdity is at its best when you

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The Frontier’s No Place for a Soft Gingerbread Man

Faced with great adversity, most gingerbread men will crumble. But not the gingerbread men of the Cloves family. No, they are tough cookies.
“You ready?” Samuel T. Cloves yelled to his friend Billy.
“I am, but I think this is crazy.” Billy’s frosty mouth quivered on his brown cookie face. He perched on

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For Waffles

Let the stars be my witnesses: I, Kepler, would do everything in my power to get a waffle.
The sweet, cinnamony scent of the breakfast delicacy wafted through the starship’s hallways and down to my workstation. Ever since Aurora had joined our motley crew, I’d enjoyed the immense pleasure of taste-testing every culinary

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Pumpkin Head Passion

“S-s-sir, please!” Malcolm hunkers low in his chair, hiding behind his notebook. “We’ve talked about this! You have to remain calm—”
Fire spews through the hollow eyes of my pumpkin head as I tower over him. “I am completely calm, Malcolm!”
My butler, currently acting as my therapist, cowers deeper into his chair.

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