By Rachel Dib
“I’m serious; I don’t need a bodyguard.” Moxly scowled, arms crossed. He grunted when Brix swung him around to face the entryway mirror.
“Do you see that face?”
Moxly pulled out of Brix’s grasp and made a point of adjusting his tunic. “I’ve seen it many times, dear brother. It’s mine.”
“Yes. It’s yours.” Brix held up a flyer.
Moxly flicked his gaze over the colored drawing and tilted his head. The printed visage matched his own, right down to the impish gleam in his green eyes and the faded scar just below his hairline. Though he found the likeness a bit disturbing, Moxly accepted the paper with a grin.
“Hey, they got my good side!”
“Well, your good side is being distributed to all the hitmen on Cavern Dice’s payroll.” Brix snatched the flyer back. “Maybe you should think twice before stealing from a mobster.”
“I didn’t steal.”
Brix lifted a brow. “You impersonated one of Cavern’s men, broke into his safe, and took his money. How is that not stealing?”
“We both know Cavern didn’t get that money legally. Otherwise, he would’ve reported it missing instead of going underground. And you’d be arresting me for the crime.”
“I should still arrest you,” Brix said through gritted teeth.
“But you won’t. Because I’m your little brother, and you love me.”
“No, it’s because, during your escapade, you also grabbed evidence linking Cavern to the laundering scheme I’ve been investigating.”
Moxly bowed. “You’re welcome.”
Brix shook his head. “Until I can find and arrest Cavern, you need protection. A Xintixa I’ve worked with in the past has agreed to take your case.”
Moxly groaned. “You know I don’t get along with those overgrown squirrels.”
“Probably because you keep calling them overgrown squirrels.” Brix pinched the bridge of his nose. “Look, he’s doing this as a personal favor. Xintixa are the best fighters around. Since I can’t stay with you, please accept the guard.”
“Fine,” Moxly muttered. “What’s his name?”
“Phezznibbet. But just call him Phezz.”
Moxy sighed. “Phezz. Got it.”
They found the red-coated, fluffy-tailed Xintixa waiting in the front garden. Dressed for war, Phezz wore a steel helmet and a bandolier of knives. Considering his battle-readiness, Moxly thought it strange to see him sniffing lilies.
Phezz’s head snapped up at the brothers’ approach. Seeing them, he trotted over on his hind legs.
“Phezz, you remember my brother, Moxly,” Brix greeted.
“I do.” A hint of disapproval gleamed in the Xintixa’s eyes, but he nodded. “He will be safe in my paws.”
“Thank you. I better get back to the castle.”
Moxly fought the urge to roll his eyes when Brix passed him a warning look.
“Stay out of trouble, will you?”
Moxly held up his hands. “I have an errand to run, then I’ll head straight back home. Promise.”
Once Brix had left, Moxly studied the furry creature before him. Xintixa were certainly mighty warriors in theory, but Moxly couldn’t imagine how.
I mean, he’s not even three feet tall. What good would he be against one of Cavern’s men?
“You claimed to have an errand?” Phezz asked.
“Yes.” Moxly bit his cheek. “But you know, it won’t take long. You could stay here. I have some cheese in the fridge.”
The Xintixa’s nose twitched in interest, but he quickly shook his head. “Staying behind would break the terms of my contract. Like it or not, I’m going with you.”
“Thought you’d say that.” Moxly stuffed his hands in his pockets and headed toward the road. “Let’s go then.”
“Can I ask the nature of your errand?”
“Oh, I’m just seeing a man about a unicorn.”
Phezz fell quiet for a moment, then narrowed his eyes. “Are you truly searching for one, or is that a euphemism for something illegal?”
“Depends on your definition of illegal.”
“An unlawful act for which, when caught, the perpetrator must atone.”
“Huh. Interesting.” Moxly headed up a side street.
Phezz quickened his pace. “I will not involve myself in illicit activity.”
“I did say you could stay home and eat cheese.” Moxly turned a corner. He spotted the blue door a few yards away. But what to do with the judgy rodent.
“As per my contract, I cannot allow you to undergo such tasks, either.”
“Really. And just what do you plan—” Moxly’s words died on his lips. The Xintixa had been so swift, Moxly had barely registered the squirrel-like being’s movement till he felt claws digging into his shoulders and back, and the creature’s blade pricking his throat.
“I plan to take you home,” Phezz growled in his ear. “You can commit crimes on your own time.”
Moxly swallowed and flicked his gaze back to the blue door.
“Return home,” Phezz hissed.
Moxly released a slow breath. “Look, I understand your reservations. While my errand might not be considered legal in some eyes, I have a moral obligation to complete the task.”
“And I said, complete it on your own time,” Phezz reiterated.
The blue door opened, and both of their heads snapped up. A little gnome boy with tufts of unruly green hair bounded into the yard. A moment later, his mother appeared in the doorway. She watched, a small smile on her lips, as her son bent to retrieve a ball.
“Let’s go,” Phezz whispered. “Before they see you.”
“If I go, they’ll suffer for it.” Moxly felt the Xintixa shift slightly on his back. When he didn’t comment, Moxly continued. “They owe a debt to the man you’re protecting me from. Was the money I plan to give them obtained using foul play? Yes. But I took it from the same man who’s threatening them. So…”
Phezz dropped to the ground. “You’re helping that family pay off a debt?”
“Yes.”
“With stolen money?”
“Depends on your definition of stolen.”
The Xintixa’s beady black eyes scrutinized Moxly’s face. He turned around. “I suppose I can look away just this once.”
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
“I’m just seeing a man about a unicorn” had me in stitches. Great story.
Thank you 😊
Phezz: “He will be safe in my paws”
Biden: “He will be safe in my. Pause.”
Thank you for reading!
Superb. This was a very enjoyable read.
I’m glad you enjoyed it 😊
Great read
Thank you!
Loved it! Is there more??
I’m glad you enjoyed it! If you liked these characters, they also appear in my stories, “One Too Far” and “Partners in Crime”.
Good story! Such witty sarcasm!
Thank you 😊
Excellent story, Rachel! So many cool things about this story: the witty dialogue, the twists, the moral ambiguity against black-and-white thinking… wow! And I loved how Phezz’s character plays a part in the plot.
Nice! A fun read with great characters (including your version of Phezz) with a brilliant ending.
Loved this line: “Probably because you keep calling them overgrown squirrels.” Well done!