By Elizabeth Jane Shelton

Dear Mom and Dad,

Thanks for looking after things for me while I’m gone! I know you were a little skeptical of my crazy business plan at first, but sales have been booming lately. People seem really open to the idea of a café with more live animals than just cats! I can’t believe no one’s done this before!

Don’t worry about the logistics, the routine is pretty simple. I follow this checklist every day. You know how my memory is!

• 4:30am: Unlock doors. Turn on lights. Feed the cats.
• 5:00am: Bert* arrives. Feed the reptiles.
• 5:30am: Baristas arrive (see attached schedule for who’s opening each day). Feed the dogs.
• 6:00am: Set up the tables. Wipe down the counter. Feed the birds.
• 6:30am: Opening! Feed the people!
• 7:15am: Steve* arrives. After he leaves, feed the rabbits.
• 7:30am-2:30pm: Business as usual. At some point, feed the fish.
• 2:30pm-4:30pm: Events (varies).
• 4:30pm: Closing!
• 5:00pm: Feed everyone again in reverse order.
• 5:30pm: Clean out enclosures.
• 6:00pm: Go home!

You’ll need a few more details so things don’t get too hairy. Or scaly. Lol.

First, the people.

Bert is my chef. He has mastered pastries that can be enjoyed by both animals and humans, but he’s also a bit of a wild card. Stay out of his way. Let him cook. He’s much better with food and pets than people. Try anything he gives you. It’ll be delicious.

Steve arrives at the same time every morning. He will order eight shots of espresso, one carrot for himself, and one to feed to Guinevere and Lancelot. It’s best to have all those things ready when he arrives. Don’t feed Gwen and Lance until after Steve leaves or they won’t eat Steve’s carrot, and he’ll get upset.

The baristas are great except when Stacy and Jean are together. I try not to put them on the same shift—they’re more interested in talking to each other than serving customers—but they trade shifts behind my back to make it work. Just keep an eye on the line while they’re on duty and make sure it doesn’t get too long.

There’s a group of families that likes to bring their kids in on Friday afternoons. The little girl with the missing front tooth likes to pull the cats’ tails, but if you can get her watching the fish, she’ll be mesmerized until it’s time to go. Do NOT let her near Hortense.

The HVAC guy is coming on Wednesday after closing for the semi-annual inspection. He is allergic to every animal in the shop. I don’t know why they keep sending him. It’s better for everyone if you can keep the animals in the back room while he’s there.

Speaking of the animals:

The dogs are the easiest. They love everyone except for Missy the tortoise.

Beware: Missy is an escape artist. I’m convinced she breaks out just to annoy the dogs, but since she’s not too fast, you can usually relocate her before there’s too much pandemonium. From time to time I completely lose track of her, but I’ve found that if you put some orange slices in a bowl in the middle of the floor, she’ll reappear eventually.

Hortense is a biter, which isn’t doing much for his likeability among potential adopters. If he gets a little extra snippy, take him on a walk. There’s a bearded dragon harness in the cabinet in the back. I’d wear the Kevlar gloves when you’re putting it on him, just in case. You can take him down to the bookstore and back—he likes that.

I created a reference sheet for the cats, which is also attached here. They each have their own personalities. The summary is that no, you didn’t forget to feed Cupcake—she’s just dramatic; yes, Bilbo will climb on the cabinets, and no matter how loud he yells, he does know how to get himself down; and yes, Piranesi will just walk into walls for no reason. He’s fine. I’ve had him tested.

If customers are interested in adoption, great! Joe at Second Chance Animal Shelter has everything you’ll need. Just call him up and he’ll come over and help out. By the way, leave Joe alone, Mom. I’m not interested, and he’s got a girlfriend.

With a few exceptions, you can play whatever music you want, but keep it clean, please. I usually play the Ukulele Remixes: Greatest Hits playlist by Strumadumdum on Spotify. Do not lose customers with your music choices. No punk rock. No heavy metal. You know I love your band, but it’s not appropriate for a coffee shop.

And absolutely no Rebecca Black. I’m serious, guys.

I think that’s about it! I won’t have cell service at the ukulele retreat, but if there’s an emergency, you can call the retreat staff, and they’ll let me talk to you. But honestly, Bert can answer most questions, and Joe can help with animal crises. I have faith in you! You can do this!

Thanks again! Love you lots! See you in a couple of weeks!

Love,

Harmony

***

Ignacia Star looked up from her daughter’s letter and shook her head. “I’m sorry, hon, I read it three times. It doesn’t say what to do with the bear.”

Dusty Star sighed, an astonishing feat considering the three-hundred-pound black bear sitting on his chest. He reached up and scratched the bear behind one ear. “Time to call Joe?”

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Elizabeth Jane Shelton has loved stories of every kind since she was young, although fantasy is her favorite. She strives to write stories that are both entertaining and meaningful, and she hopes to impact others and honor her Creator with her writing. If she’s not working on a story, it’s probably because she’s writing code at her job as a software engineer.

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